Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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