Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
