It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
