guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Randomize