Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Randomize
