My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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