I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Randomize
