How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Randomize
