I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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