You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Randomize
