All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
