apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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