So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Randomize
