its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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