he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
