I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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