I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Randomize
