i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
