dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
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