thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize
