This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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