I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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