My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
Randomize
