I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
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