I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
