shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Randomize
