I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Randomize
