Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
