What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
