We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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