Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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