Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
