omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
