i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize
