my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
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