Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Randomize
