did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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