we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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