Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
