i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
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