Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
