is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Randomize
