So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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