used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
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