Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Randomize
