Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Randomize
