You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
