In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
