im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
