The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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