So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Randomize
