Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
