I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize
